jokes - 31 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Love Letter

Respected sir.,
As i am Suffering From “Love”
But i am Unable To Correct a “Figure”
So Kindly Requesting You To Arrange a Good Homely “GIRL” in Your Relation
or Neighbour Within Two Days. Thank You..
Yours Lovingly
“Good Boy”

Student & Teacher

How Could You Expect

A Single Student To Learn

Six Subject.

SIR: Where did you born?

BOY: Tamil Nadu.

SIR: Which part?

BOY: Enna which part... whole body born in Tamil Nadu...

SIR: ??

Kissing Boy

a drunk boy kissed his girlfriend. 
boy : my dear sweety ur lips r very salty. 
girl : stupid standup than kiss me ;

Girl & Boy

girl : what do you like in me ? 
… 
boy ; those who white big balls having black dots on it . 
… 
girl : what ? 
… 
boy : ya I like your eyes , its very beautiful .

jokes - 27 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Sweet School Memories.... 

1.Oneside Love's.. 
2.Silent mode Mobiles.. 
3.Last bench Comedies.. 
4.Intervel Kadalai.. 
5.Escape from Seminars.. 
6.Last period Galaataas.. 
7.B'day Treats.. 
8.Last Minite preparations.. 
9.Over night study for next day exam.. 
10.Friends Family Eunctions.. 
11.Internel marks problem.. 
12.Gang fights.. 
Those days will never come ago. 

Gopal Soap

doctor: which soap u use ..? 
chimpu : gopal soap..gopal paste,gopal presh… 
doctor:is gopal a good company.. 
chimpu: No..he is my room mate……

MAN TO GYM COACH 

MAN : SIR IWANT TO IMPRESS MY GIRL FRIEND WHICH MACHINE SHOULD I USE 

COACH : USE THE ATM MACHINE OUTSIDE THE GYM

Smile

if 5 sec of smile can
make a photograph more
beautiful
then just imagine if u
keep smiling always
how beautiful ur life
will be.....!
so keep smiling
gud nite guyzzzz

jokes - 25 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Sleeping Boy GK Power

Once I was sleeping in class. 
TEACHER: who invented steam engine. 

I'aM(awake&asked) : what sir?? 

TEACHER: you are correct! It's James Watt. 

MORAL: A GOOD SLEEPING INCREASES GK POWER 

Father & Son

Father: when I beat how do you control yourself ? 
Son : I starting clean toilet . 
Father: how its satisfy ? 
Son : I clean with your toothbrush .

Enjoy The Every Second Of Life...! 

World Is A Theatre...! 

Our Life Is A Movie...! 

God Is The Director...! 

Nature Is The Producer...! 

You Are The Actor...! 

So Perform Well & 

Enjoy The Every Second Of Life...! 

Donate your Eye

India’s Population 120 crores. 

Per day 62,389 persons died

Per day 86,853 persons born

India’s Blind people’s Strength is 6,82,460. 

If Daily died people donate  their Eye 

With in 10 days The Blind peoples get their eye

jokes - 24 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Girl & Sales Man

Girl:- Hw much is this dress. 
Salesman:- Only 5 kisses. 
Girl:Ok,Hw much is this Saree? 
Salesman:- Only 10 kisses. 
Girl:- Ok,Pack this saree,my Grandma wil pay the bill 

Jack Marriage Invitation

Jack fixed his marriage on 2nd september 
He sent Invitation to his frnds like this. 

Marriage is on 2nd.Plz cum on 1ST NIGHT,LETS ALL ENJOY" 

Wat a funny british man.

Sardar interview 

sardar attending an interview 

manager ; do you know MS-Office? 

sardar: sir give me the address I will go there ....

kick 

SMOKE 
1 minute kick 

DRINK 
2 hours kick 

LOVE 
3 month kick 

but, 
LOVE FAILURE 
life long kick. 

Ultimate Insult: 
Heavy rain... 
In Bus Stop, people were waiting in queue for bus 
1 beggar came, collected money from every1 & went home by auto;-) @

jokes - 23 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Jokes


wife is a "reced call"
baby is a "dialed call"
lover is a "wating call"
figure is a "missed call' 

Problem, Talent and Luck 2 boys love 1 girl = Problem 1 boy love 2 girls=Talent 2 girls love 1 boy=Luck

Friends for ever

Always
do
something
for
your
friends
even
u
r
in
busy.

Because,
one
day
u
can
get
free
time
but
not
ur
friends
back.........

Newton's Law

"Perfect example for newton third law:

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

"Every time i open the book,

My eyes close automatically.....

Cricket

A teacher told

all students in a class 2 write essay abt cricket match

All wer busy in writing except 1 kid

He wrote "due to rain match cancel".

Bill Gate resigned his Job


Mr. Bill Gates resigned from his Job as the Chairman of Microsoft after 

receiving letter from 'SARAVANAN' 

Sir, I have some Qestions, to ask 

1] Keybord alphabets are not in order, 
when will you release the correct version? 
2] There is a START button 
but no button to STOP? 
3] I have leart MS word, 
when will you release MS sentence? 
4] There is a Recycle-bin no 
Recycle-Scooter/Recycle-Car bin. Why? 

finally one personnal Question 

5] Why is you name GATES 
when you sell WINDOWS? 

maths 

mathska full form you know?
M=MENTAL 
A=ATTACKS 
T=TO 
H=HEALTHY 
S=STUDENT

life with friend

And love is sim card! 

Balance is Parents...! 

Friends is Battery...! 

if there is low battery,life is Switched off!...

Software & Begger

A railway station beggar meets another beggar. 
A software engineer meets another software engineer. 
Both of them ask the same question to each other. 
What is the question? 

"So, which platform are you working on?"

jokes - 22 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

EXAM PATTERN: 

1995: anwer all the question 

2000: answer any 5 question 

2010: answer either a (or) b 

2015: atleast read the question 

2020: thanks for coming 

Funny Rich Man

Rich man: today i have 14 cars, 15 hotels, 8 farmhouses, crores of bankbalance..And wat do u have? 

POOR MAN:i hav a son 

and His girl friend is ur daughter.

Sincerer Employee

Man joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. 

Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening. 

Man Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright. 

Problem - Talent - Luck

2 boys love 1 girl = Problem 

1 boy love 2 girls=Talent 
2 girls love 1 boy=Luck

BillGates & Waiter

bill gates gave 50 rs tip to the waiter 

WAITER:SIR YESTERDAY UR SON GAVE 500 RS TIP AND U GAVE ONLY 50? 

BILL GATES:HE IS THE SON OF A MILLIONAIRE AND IM THE SON OF FARMER

jokes - 13 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Student Succesing and 
Failure reasons... 

1. Success  reason
"Brilliant" Teacher.. 

2.Failure reason
"Beautiful" Teacher...

TENSION

what is tension.a beautiful girl asks lift from you.on the way she fall ill and u take her to hospital.Doctor says "congrats" you are going to become a father.thats it. you get TENSED.you say- but the baby is not mine.the girl says he is only the father of my baby. you have more TENSION. police comes and medical checkup is done.report comes. which says that you can never become a father.even more TENSION for you.anyhow u thank god and return to home. then u think At home i have 2 kids. whose are those.this is real TENSION.

Mom &  Son

 

mom : who is tippu sultan ?.

Son : i dono. 
Mom : concentrate ur study u vl know. 

Son : who is pooja aunty ?. 
Mom : i dono. 
Son : concentrate on ur husband u vl know.

Difference between  Coffee Shop &  Wine Shop ? 

SIR: What's the 
difference between 
Coffee Shop & 
Wine Shop ? 

STUDENT: 
Very Simple Sir, 

Love Starts In 
Coffee Shop 
Love Ends In 
Wine Shop

jokes - 3 July 2011 Submissions & Comments

Wife & Husband

Wife: Darling today is our wedding anniversery how can we celeberate it today ? 

Husband: Let us observe 2 mins silence.........

Success
Success Ladder is never crowded at the top, 
There is competition only the Bottom. 

So Aim high.

A Great Thought

Man asked GOD: 
Give me everything to enjoy the Life. 
God smiled and Replied 
"I have given you life to enjoy everything..."